Hello! The confusion is understandable. What I mean by that is if you choose to take Rabbit's route (the story branches after the Bacchanal, where you choose a masked character to continue speaking to) then you are locked out of romancing Thomas.
I truly love the story and think you're doing an amazing job! That being said, I have noticed quite a few instances of incorrect wording. I believe that having an editor could really enhance the quality of the writing. If it's not too bold, I volunteer to help because I feel your work deserves to be the best it can be, and I would love to help you accomplish that. ☺️🩷
Now the things I particularly love: (Spoiler)
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How you wrote the father:
I do hope that your father isn't like this. That being said as someone who has a father who is quite similar and if we were back in those times would be identical… You wrote an abusive father perfectly. The breaking of those he should love… not caring about those he should but rather about others' view of him. The fact that he was so selfish, as to sacrifice the happiness of those he should have protected… just to make his life better. Magnificent and heartbreaking.
How you introduce the magic system:
You do so in such a way that it seems natural and normal as if it truly belongs. Sometimes people just drop magic into a story and it feels as if it comes out of nowhere… it's irritating and ruins my immersion. You did the opposite. It drew me in more and gave me a happy surprise! Thank you for that! ☺️
The amount of character creation and how you have it happen:
Sometimes people stop the story just to drop the character creation which again ruins my immersion. The story shouldn't be stopped just to customize your character. If they're unable to code it in such a way as to allow the story to keep flowing I feel they should begin the story with the character creation this way you're still able to customize your character and the story isn't affected. I feel you managed to perfectly incorporate the character creation into the story. Thank you for that!
The introduction of characters:
Every character is well introduced and seems to belong. You don't randomly drop any characters but instead, build the story up to meeting them or you use them to tell the story itself. I feel you did very well with that. Btw, I particularly love Francis! She's sooo sweet. Again, as someone who has a father who I would have been better off without I love that she (main character) still has a loving parental figure.
Overall: 9.5/10 I will most likely pre-order it next month! Thank you for making this and making it a great day/night.
This was so incredibly thought out and I truly appreciate your feedback! I would be more than happy to add you as a tester. If you could DM me on https://www.tumblr.com/blog/bacchanal-if or send an email to naughtycupidgames@gmail.com I can get you set up on the Discord channel. This is my first time writing anything, so any help is wonderful. It is only important to keep to an 18th century writing style! I'm so glad that the elements you described were introduced in a way that flowed. I worried about keeping the magic system relevent because unless you choose them for a hobby/particular story options, it really isn't that important in the world, but it does exist.
I am so sorry that your father was actually like this. I did not have a James in my life, but there were, unfortunately, some similarities I could pull from. I do hope that his character hasn't triggered any bad memories, or if it has, that playing as the MC and eventually triumphing will help with them. Francis truly is a treasure!
For it being your first time writing anything… I am incredibly impressed. Everything is top-tier and written wonderfully. As long as the magic system isn't introduced and then completely dropped I don't see a problem with it not being that important.
Thank you for your empathy and concern. ☺️ I'm honestly desensitized to it by now… my father is a horrible person but I don't have him in my life bothering me anymore. It still hurts but I don't feel the despair that I used to. In fact, I find reading well-written abusive people is cathartic… I'm still not sure why… perhaps because it makes me feel seen or maybe it's because they (the abusers) often get their comeuppance. Either way, I haven't been triggered but again thank you for your concern. ☺️
Francis sort of reminds me of my favorite teacher in high school… she honestly loved me and helped me see that I didn't deserve how my father was treating me. She was one of my best friends and although I got teased as a teacher's pet I wouldn't change how close I was to her for the world. People like Francis are indeed treasures.
I thank you so much for your interest and support! The Tumblr Password is for access to a secret NSFW blog where I answer spicy asks about the characters ❤️🔥
Just pre-ordered. You know...I wasn't sure how I felt about Edward. But after what I've read in the nsfw tumbler...now I want to give him a chance. I'd say the only one that's a solid no for me would be the Uninvited Guest. xD
On a side note, I see a lot of talk about red and green flag romances. I'm a bit confused by this? Can someone explain this to me. (I mean, I get the idea of red flags irl. So I assume its similar...?)
Thank you so much for your support, and my apologies for responding so late! You are right in that it is similar to red flags irl. To quote from my FAQ on tumblr:
In short, I would not consider the relationships you can have with them to be healthy in the real world, but acceptable to explore in fiction.
Ah, I see. Yeah, I tend to love some red flag ros in fiction but they would never get a chance in rl. That's the fun of fiction. Though so far, TUG is a solid no either way. Thanks for answering. Honestly, Thomas already calls to my heart and will probably be my main RO.
Understandable, lol! I also enjoy red flags in fiction. I only feel it's my responsibility to remind readers that this kind of romance isn't healthy irl 💜
I'm so happy that Thomas calls to you! They are so precious and I hope you enjoy their scenes.
Not a stupid question by any means! It will run on the browser and you will also be able to download it. The files should work on mac should you choose to download.
Hello! I thank you so much in your support by pre-ordering. At this time there is not release date, so I thank you for your patience. I post progress updates on the story's blog if you would like to follow along.
Hello! I'm sorry if this is a super silly question but I purchased the pre-order and downloaded the files available. But I can only read up to chapter 1 of the demo. I wasn't sure if I was missing something and am totally having a brain fart or if that's what's available to play for the pre-order? Because I've seen folx discussing enjoying the characters so I wasn't sure if that was it or if I'm totally missing something.
Hello! Thank you so much for your support and enjoyment of the story! Only Chapter 1 is available in the demo so far. As soon as I've finished and tested Chapter 2 I will update the demo, and once I get to the spicy scenes I will start to make the updates for pre-orders only 💜 I'm so very happy with how much people enjoy the characters, and I believe it is due to all the asks I have answered on tumblr as well as the snippets I've provided on Discord.
Hi, I'm a little confused, by deciding Ederton's gender does that affect all romance options? I'm just curious if I'll be able to make some RO's male and some female in the same playthrough.
Hello! I have the answer for you here, copied from the devblog:
Will the characters being gender selectable make it easier to figure out who they are? You can only romance one gender in each playthrough. Choosing Edith will make all the ROs female, and choosing Edward will make them all male.
It is unfortunate, but I had to do it this way to preserve the mystery. I’m sorry, fellow pan/bi people. There are always multiple playthroughs!
From what ive seen from the "spicy" tumblr? Oooh boy I cannot WAIT for this to be completed. You're doing everyone a favour by bringing this into existence. Lovely writing, lovely mind, lovely person. Thank you!
This is pretty interesting so far, if incredibly short; I'm looking forward to more! I hope that you plan to make the demo longer, as I feel it's way too short to be asking money for at the moment. I'll probably buy it once the demo is long enough to give a reasonable idea of the romance and nsfw content, and after we've met some of the other characters, so I can make sure there are at least a couple that I find appealing.
Also, if possible, could we get a choice for dark blond hair added to the list of hair colors?
Thank you very much!! I do plan to make the demo longer. Eventually, the entire game in sfw format will be available for free. I can certainly add the option for dark blonde.
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Comments
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I confess I was a little confused. Thomas can be the Rabbit but in the rabbit route he can't have a romance with him?
Hello! The confusion is understandable. What I mean by that is if you choose to take Rabbit's route (the story branches after the Bacchanal, where you choose a masked character to continue speaking to) then you are locked out of romancing Thomas.
I truly love the story and think you're doing an amazing job! That being said, I have noticed quite a few instances of incorrect wording. I believe that having an editor could really enhance the quality of the writing. If it's not too bold, I volunteer to help because I feel your work deserves to be the best it can be, and I would love to help you accomplish that. ☺️🩷
Now the things I particularly love: (Spoiler)
|
√
How you wrote the father:
I do hope that your father isn't like this. That being said as someone who has a father who is quite similar and if we were back in those times would be identical… You wrote an abusive father perfectly. The breaking of those he should love… not caring about those he should but rather about others' view of him. The fact that he was so selfish, as to sacrifice the happiness of those he should have protected… just to make his life better. Magnificent and heartbreaking.
How you introduce the magic system:
You do so in such a way that it seems natural and normal as if it truly belongs. Sometimes people just drop magic into a story and it feels as if it comes out of nowhere… it's irritating and ruins my immersion. You did the opposite. It drew me in more and gave me a happy surprise! Thank you for that! ☺️
The amount of character creation and how you have it happen:
Sometimes people stop the story just to drop the character creation which again ruins my immersion. The story shouldn't be stopped just to customize your character. If they're unable to code it in such a way as to allow the story to keep flowing I feel they should begin the story with the character creation this way you're still able to customize your character and the story isn't affected. I feel you managed to perfectly incorporate the character creation into the story. Thank you for that!
The introduction of characters:
Every character is well introduced and seems to belong. You don't randomly drop any characters but instead, build the story up to meeting them or you use them to tell the story itself. I feel you did very well with that. Btw, I particularly love Francis! She's sooo sweet. Again, as someone who has a father who I would have been better off without I love that she (main character) still has a loving parental figure.
Overall: 9.5/10 I will most likely pre-order it next month! Thank you for making this and making it a great day/night.
(Edited to warn about spoilers)
This was so incredibly thought out and I truly appreciate your feedback! I would be more than happy to add you as a tester. If you could DM me on https://www.tumblr.com/blog/bacchanal-if or send an email to naughtycupidgames@gmail.com I can get you set up on the Discord channel. This is my first time writing anything, so any help is wonderful. It is only important to keep to an 18th century writing style! I'm so glad that the elements you described were introduced in a way that flowed. I worried about keeping the magic system relevent because unless you choose them for a hobby/particular story options, it really isn't that important in the world, but it does exist.
I am so sorry that your father was actually like this. I did not have a James in my life, but there were, unfortunately, some similarities I could pull from. I do hope that his character hasn't triggered any bad memories, or if it has, that playing as the MC and eventually triumphing will help with them. Francis truly is a treasure!
For it being your first time writing anything… I am incredibly impressed. Everything is top-tier and written wonderfully. As long as the magic system isn't introduced and then completely dropped I don't see a problem with it not being that important.
Thank you for your empathy and concern. ☺️ I'm honestly desensitized to it by now… my father is a horrible person but I don't have him in my life bothering me anymore. It still hurts but I don't feel the despair that I used to. In fact, I find reading well-written abusive people is cathartic… I'm still not sure why… perhaps because it makes me feel seen or maybe it's because they (the abusers) often get their comeuppance. Either way, I haven't been triggered but again thank you for your concern. ☺️
Francis sort of reminds me of my favorite teacher in high school… she honestly loved me and helped me see that I didn't deserve how my father was treating me. She was one of my best friends and although I got teased as a teacher's pet I wouldn't change how close I was to her for the world. People like Francis are indeed treasures.
I thank you so much for your interest and support! The Tumblr Password is for access to a secret NSFW blog where I answer spicy asks about the characters ❤️🔥
I'm so excited about this game!!!!!!! Just the demo is so well done and detailed. I am gonna explode when more is released. You are so talented <3 <3
You have no idea how much this means for me to hear 💜 I thank you so much for your support, and I can not wait to release the next chapter!
Just pre-ordered. You know...I wasn't sure how I felt about Edward. But after what I've read in the nsfw tumbler...now I want to give him a chance. I'd say the only one that's a solid no for me would be the Uninvited Guest. xD
On a side note, I see a lot of talk about red and green flag romances. I'm a bit confused by this? Can someone explain this to me. (I mean, I get the idea of red flags irl. So I assume its similar...?)
Thank you so much for your support, and my apologies for responding so late! You are right in that it is similar to red flags irl. To quote from my FAQ on tumblr:
In short, I would not consider the relationships you can have with them to be healthy in the real world, but acceptable to explore in fiction.
Ah, I see. Yeah, I tend to love some red flag ros in fiction but they would never get a chance in rl. That's the fun of fiction. Though so far, TUG is a solid no either way. Thanks for answering. Honestly, Thomas already calls to my heart and will probably be my main RO.
Understandable, lol! I also enjoy red flags in fiction. I only feel it's my responsibility to remind readers that this kind of romance isn't healthy irl 💜
I'm so happy that Thomas calls to you! They are so precious and I hope you enjoy their scenes.
rubbing my hands together evilly 😈 {loving the update}
Thank you so much! It fuels my passion to write upon hearing it received well.💜
Love the demo so far, definitely one of the best I have read which has lead me to preordering the game.
Thank you so much! I fully appreciate your enjoyment and support of the story💜
probably a stupid question but it's all going to be online right? and it wont matter that i've got a mac rather than windows.
again probably a dumb question, but i am a very anxious human
Not a stupid question by any means! It will run on the browser and you will also be able to download it. The files should work on mac should you choose to download.
Hello! I'm interested in this so far. How long will it be available for $3USD before it goes up to $5USD? Thank you
You can find it in this post! :D https://bacchanal-if.tumblr.com/post/726671468837142528/can-you-answer-for-how-l... I forgot that they have a Patreon so it might change?
Wow, thank you for finding that! This information is correct. Thank you both for your interest!
I preordered it. When is it due to come out? Thank you
Hello! I thank you so much in your support by pre-ordering. At this time there is not release date, so I thank you for your patience. I post progress updates on the story's blog if you would like to follow along.
Hello! I'm sorry if this is a super silly question but I purchased the pre-order and downloaded the files available. But I can only read up to chapter 1 of the demo. I wasn't sure if I was missing something and am totally having a brain fart or if that's what's available to play for the pre-order? Because I've seen folx discussing enjoying the characters so I wasn't sure if that was it or if I'm totally missing something.
Hello! Thank you so much for your support and enjoyment of the story! Only Chapter 1 is available in the demo so far. As soon as I've finished and tested Chapter 2 I will update the demo, and once I get to the spicy scenes I will start to make the updates for pre-orders only 💜 I'm so very happy with how much people enjoy the characters, and I believe it is due to all the asks I have answered on tumblr as well as the snippets I've provided on Discord.
Hi, I'm a little confused, by deciding Ederton's gender does that affect all romance options? I'm just curious if I'll be able to make some RO's male and some female in the same playthrough.
Hello! I have the answer for you here, copied from the devblog:
Will the characters being gender selectable make it easier to figure out who they are?
You can only romance one gender in each playthrough. Choosing Edith will make all the ROs female, and choosing Edward will make them all male.
It is unfortunate, but I had to do it this way to preserve the mystery. I’m sorry, fellow pan/bi people. There are always multiple playthroughs!
That's okay, thank you for answering!
You are welcome! I do wish I could make the system work with different genders for the ROs, but it would compromise the identities. 💜
Its really good can't wait for the rest :D <3
Thank you very much! I can't wait to put out Chapter 2.
Ahhh this is amazing so far! Im so happy to have found this gem!
I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
Loved the update! Always look forward to more!
Thank you so much! 💜
hello,will there be art or is it strictly just text
Hello! There will be portraits of the ROs, but other than that I have yet to decide.
Does the demo only ends after character customization?
For what is currently on itch, yes!
thank you
From what ive seen from the "spicy" tumblr? Oooh boy I cannot WAIT for this to be completed. You're doing everyone a favour by bringing this into existence. Lovely writing, lovely mind, lovely person. Thank you!
Also, I'm already in love with E :)
Thank you so very much! I have a few things up my sleeve that I'm saving for the story... :)
This is pretty interesting so far, if incredibly short; I'm looking forward to more! I hope that you plan to make the demo longer, as I feel it's way too short to be asking money for at the moment. I'll probably buy it once the demo is long enough to give a reasonable idea of the romance and nsfw content, and after we've met some of the other characters, so I can make sure there are at least a couple that I find appealing.
Also, if possible, could we get a choice for dark blond hair added to the list of hair colors?
Thank you very much!! I do plan to make the demo longer. Eventually, the entire game in sfw format will be available for free. I can certainly add the option for dark blonde.
Thanks for letting me know. Looking forward to more! :)
hello dear author *^*
even if the demo was short i really liked it and can't wait to have more content ! is there a date for the release of the full game ?
Thank you so much!! There is no current date for release, but I am actively working on it!
loved the demo keep up the great work ^^
Thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it.